How I Got Here


Welcome to my life's puzzle. For most of my 36 year journey, I've felt like a novice jigsaw puzzler. There is a beautiful picture displayed before me, but a million tiny pieces scattered about. It starts out looking mostly like a chaotic mess. Assembling the pieces requires patience, perseverance and faith, but in time they begin to fit together one by one. The first 26 years or so were spent finding my straight edges - in that time the Lord began to form a border that would frame my life. Suddenly, within the past ten years, the pieces are forming a middle. I can begin to see the picture. The Lord sweeps me off my feet and I discover that life without faith is no longer an option. A piece falls into place. I have a longstanding passion for health, food and fitness. I also have a longstanding battle with eating disorders. Five years ago nobody on Earth knew this. Three years ago the Lord removes a veil to reveal truths I never imagined and set me on a journey toward freedom. He's taking me down a fascinating path toward discovering self-love, accepting His love for me, and exploring the radiance He has always had in mind for my life. A piece falls into place. Last year my husband was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease and my son was told no more gluten, egg, dairy, or corn. I am now acutely aware of why food has been such an important part of my life and begin to view it very differently as I work to "heal" my family. A piece falls into place. The Lord has ever so kindly, sometimes gently, sometimes firmly, sometimes hilariously directed me to this very point in my life. It is with great anticipation that I keep my eyes firmly planted on the stunning image on the box cover. Thanks for joining with me as I continue putting the pieces together.


Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Nearly Sugar-free Peanut Butter Cups in Minutes!

There is one word in my vocabulary that evokes more conflicting emotions than I can number - chocolate. The love-hate relationship I have with chocolate has a plot thick enough to cast an impressive romantic drama. I really do love chocolate, I legitimately enjoy it. I often crave it. I sometimes indulge in it. However, it can also be a huge source of struggle for me. It is, without a doubt, the number one trigger that can lead me to a dangerous place. When you identify that you have an eating disorder, like any addiction, the most effective way to guard yourself from spiraling into an ugly (and sinful) place, it to avoid the source of addiction all together. I have learned about myself that I simply can't handle chocolate. In a few, well structured situations (mostly where there is a limited supply and I'm not alone) I can handle the indulgence. However, I have learned that I am setting myself up for failure if I have it in my house. That said, sometimes you just REALLY want something chocolaty right? Me too, so I've come up with a healthier, safer option that allows me the enjoyment without the risk. These are insanely easy to make and really, really good. I hope you enjoy them!

Nearly Sugar-free Peanut Butter Cups (adapted from a million places, renditions of this recipe are plentiful)

Here's the problem, I always sort of wing this recipe, so quantities will vary from batch to batch. If you desire more (or less) sweetness, adjust the amount of sweetener to your liking!

About 1/4 c coconut oil
About 1/2 c almond or natural peanut butter
About 3 tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder (preferably raw cocoa)
About 2 tbsp honey (here's the almost sugar-free part, a little sugar in the honey)
About 2 1/2 - 3 squirts Vanilla Stevia
About 1 tbsp vanilla
(if you want add 2 tbsp real dark chocolate - this will add a little sugar)

*I've played around with flavors too, and would encourage experimentation. I've used orange extract, mint, added instant coffee, coconut extract - all yummy!

Melt all together in a saucepan on low heat until smooth and to taste. Pour into aluminum muffin pan liners. Freeze for as little as 10 minutes or keep in freezer for weeks.

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